VirtualXMag ArticleBase Stuff Africa News Advertise Videos Shop  SUBSCRIBE

A Nice Guy

• Adventurers of yesteryear • Adventure Sport • Africa: The Good News • Book Reviews
• Safari Health • Bush Cuisine • Conservation • Diving • Fishing • History • Hunting •
• Luxury Travel • Photography • News and Reviews • Overlanding • Other stuff  •
 • Rookie writersSurvival and Bush Craft • True North •

And then, alas, there is the church. Christianity, as it currently exists, has done some terrible things to men. When all is said and done, I think most men in the church believe that God put them on the earth to be a good boy.

The problem with men, we are told, is that they don’t know how to keep their promises, be spiritual leaders, talk to their wives, or raise their children. But, if they will try real hard they can reach the lofty summit of becoming . . . a nice guy.

That’s what we hold up as models of Christian maturity: Really Nice Guys. We don’t smoke, drink, or swear; that’s what makes us men. Now let me ask my male readers: In all your boyhood dreams growing up, did you ever dream of becoming a Nice Guy? (Ladies, was the Prince of your dreams dashing . . . or merely nice?)

Really now—do I overstate my case? Walk into most churches in America, have a look around, and ask yourself this question: What is a Christian man? Don’t listen to what is said, look at what you find there. There is no doubt about it. You’d have to admit a Christian man is . . . bored.

At a recent church retreat I was talking with a guy in his fifties, listening really, about his own journey as a man. "I’ve pretty much tried for the last twenty years to be a good man as the church defines it." Intrigued, I asked him to say what he thought that was. He paused for a long moment. "Dutiful," he said. "And separated from his heart."

A perfect description, I thought. Sadly right on the mark.

To subscribe to John’s emails, click on to create a profile. See also the Ransomed Heart Podcast at

• Formula to Friendship •
• In the End •
• Darker Regions of the Soul •
• The Clue •
• The Warrior Heart •
• The Great Stories •
• A Nice Guy •
• A True Father •
• We are at War •
• Our Story •
• Incredible •
• All men die •
• We bought the lie •
• Intended for pleasure •
• Do I have what it takes? •
• Created in Freedom to Be His Intimate Allies •
• Your heart •
• The Worst of All Possible Reactions •
• The evil behind all evil •
• Happy ever after has been stolen •
• Seen a painting of a naked man? •
• Come home •
• Born into an epic •
• The very best Invitation •
• A Call for change •
• You have an enemy •
• The Final Act of Self-Centeredness •
• Fierce mastery •
• There is no escaping this war •
• Dismissal and cynicism •
• The Miseries of a Dethroned Monarch •
• An Intolerable Rest •

•  •

Are you an expert on this subject?
Tell the world what you think.


Developed by

All content copyright The African Expedition Magazine.
No portion of this site or publication may be transmitted, stored or used without written permission.
All rights reserved.